It wasn’t something I saw coming. Hipsters are annoying. They’re pretentious. They aren’t quite sure what irony means but use it ALL.THE.TIME. And slowly, without realizing it, I’ve become one of them.
1. New glasses. No explanation required.
2. A 1960s telefunken stereo cabinet to play some sweet LPs (that I pick up a a thrift mall and garage sales). It fits with the decor of my apartment which consists mainly of teak from the 60s and not a single couch yet. ShanWow is an awesome friend and helped me fetch this from a random person’s house. My record finds include Duran Duran, Elton John, Billy Joel, U2 and Boney M (Rasputin!) to name a few.
3. Kicking horse coffee and a french press. Did I mention that you have to grind the beans yourself???
4. Card-carrying member of the NDP
5. A mustache tattoo on my finger. I’m not even sure where it came from.*
6. I subscribe to The Walrus magazine.
Evidence against: No iphone/instagram, no clothes from American Apparel, no beer drinking (craft or otherwise), no converse shoes
For good measure I took some extremely reliable internet quizzes and all say that I’m hipster. How can this be??? All of the music I listen to is mainstream – you would have heard of it all!!!
*Haha, joking. I would NEVER do that.